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The New Zealand Railways Magazine, Volume 1, Issue 6 (October 24, 1926)

A Hard One

A Hard One.

Effie: “Why hasn't Daddie much hair?”

Mother: “Because he thinks a lot, darling.”

Effie (pause): “But why have you got such a lot Mummie?”

Mother: “Get on with your breakfast!”

* * *

“Will you please drive off the track?” asked the engine driver. The truck driver promptly moved over.

“Thank you ever so much,” said the engineman, with a smile.

“You're very welcome,” responded the truck driver, “but you must pardon my seeming carelessness. I had no idea you were so near.”

* * *

Electrician (from top of building from which four wires dangled):

“Bill, catch hold of two of them wires.”

Bill: “Right!”

Electrician: “Feel anything?”

Bill: “No.”

Electrician: “Well, don't touch the other two —there's 2,000 volts in them.”

* * *

“Would you mind, sir, lending me your spectacles?” asked a railway traveller of the affable old gentleman in the corner seat. The request was politely granted. “And now, sir,” said the borrowing one, pocketing the glasses, “since you can no longer see to read, would you mind lending me your ‘Railway Magazine?’”