The New Zealand Railways Magazine, Volume 8, Issue 8 (December 1, 1933)
Christmas Duff (1933 model).-Take a bucket of paperhanger's paste, add plaster of Paris to taste, stiffen with stay-busks, tint with brick dust, stir in a quart of art union tickets and an I.O.U. for luck, stir with emotion, let the Alsatian worry it, drop it off the roof and leave out to dry. When set, label it “Persephone at the telephone” or “Isoseles wrestling with a rhomb,” and send it to the Annual Exhibition of Epileptic Art. Then set to work and make a real old-fashioned duff for eating purposes.
Also, greater use might be made of our own indigent fauna for pot-boiling and baking at Christmas. Take the tuatara-or two tuatara. It has been praised in song, viz; “The harp that once in tuatara's hall,” but it has never appeared on the programme as an accessory to the fact. Hence we are emboldened to offer the following recipe:
Tuatara a la Rubbergoods.-Take a tuatara, scoop out from neck to knee, soak in whisky until thoroughly blotto, then run it through the wringer and serve up the juice. The rest may be used for patching motor tyres. Should no tuatara be available, a gum boot will do as well, but a bottle is even better. The bottle should, however, be thoroughly drained before serving.
Treated in the above manner the tuatara has more kick than ever it had in its life, and is highly recommended as a cure for overeating. Unfortunately the moa has been reduced to a bony stricture and Christmas is no time for harbouring skeletons in the cupboard. Nevertheless one can't resist the thought of—, but never mind; perhaps it is all for the best if not for the “bust.”